Another New Song – Don’t Want to Run

Here’s another one I wrote with Anje Dowler and a great singer/songwriter I went to Berklee with, Mike Willis.

Staying put. Seeing love through. Walking it out. Hard, but so worth it. Enjoy!!

Download the MP3 here. Listen here.

Don’t Want to Run

I’ve always played the game
Holding back,
not giving all of me
so quick place the blame
A broken man
With an answer for everything

Can’t keep living live in overdrive
Always trying to catch my breath
My soul is tired now
I think I’m losing ground
I can’t help myself

CHORUS
I don’t want to run anymore
I’d rather stay with you and take it slow
With this love I can’t ignore
I’m finally coming undone
I don’t wanna run

A collection of memories
A fading dream
Are all I’ve had to hold
A beaten up photograph
From a moment that
I cannot seem to let go

Our love has been a battleground
Leaving us the casualties
I’ll raise my hand and call a truce
But I just can’t retreat

CHORUS

Am I too late?
Has the moment gone?
Is there a part of me alive in you?
Something I can hold on to?

CHORUS

Finally Free – New Song

Time for a new song! This one I wrote with my dear friend Anje Dowler…bunch of new ones coming up here and on the YouTube channel!

Finally Free
Anje Dowler/Ben Ward

It seemed so permanent
Felt like forever
They all said “learn from it”
It’ll get better
But walking around in chains ain’t good enough you see
So I cut those ties, the one’s that bind
And it almost killed me
But I’m still standing

Finally free

All my reasoning
Seemed so perfect
Subtle seasoning
Far from working
With no one else to blame walking right into that place
Just let it go, nothing left to know
No more excusing
Done with waiting

Finally Free

YouTube Channel Strategy

Launched my wife Olivia and her sister Hannah’s new push on their YouTube channel yesterday. I’ve been going over to the YouTube Next Lab in NYC and learning all about the platform. Before the first workshop I thought I knew the basics but after I realized how much time I have to learn. The combination of trackable links (we’re using goo.gl) with annotations in the video is particularly strong.

Our schedule we’re starting with is a new 10-15 minute episode on Mondays. We spread out social media postings (Twitter, Facebook, Instagram for both) over the day and night. The Twitter postings that tagged the other sister and YouTube worked great as the people responded to all.

On Tuesday having Olivia respond to five comments on YouTube and five comments on the blog. We’ll post to all social media and that will give us another push.

Wednesday we’ll replicate the strategy from Monday with a 3-6 minute episode.

Thursday Hannah will respond to comments with social media push.

Friday we will assemble a curated themed playlist that hits subscribers’ feeds at the end of the week.

Yesterday, the first day, we gained a little over 100 new subscribers. Had close to 700 visitors to blog (only link was directly below YouTube video saying that was where to find the recipe. My goal right now is to gain 250 new subscribers per week: 100 each new episode day and then 50 over the course of the others.

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Episode Day Postings:
10:00: YouTube and Blog go live
11:30: Olivia Twitter
12:30: Olivia Instagram
13:00: Hannah Twitter
13:30: Hannah Instagram
15:00: Olivia Facebook
19:30: Hannah Facebook

Easter Ads

I had the great privelage of producing and directing three ads that ran on the Long Island 24 hour news channel “News 12.” It was great fun to hear so many great stories of restoration (that was our theme). I hope you like them…the first features my lovely wife Olivia :).

Occupy Awesome

This was my favorite spectator sign from the 2011 NYC Marathon. There were so many great ones it was hard to pick, but this was the one. So much encouragement from so many strangers. It was incredible. It made me love NYC and it made me love the journey I’ve been on all the more.

All that said, there were some bumps along the way Sunday. It started out so well. I held back and kept my goal pace of around 10:00/mile. My knee held up great and did not hurt. I did have some pain in my other knee around mile 12. I walked a little at a couple of water stations and I was confident I could make it through to the end.

Then, after the Queensboro Bridge, heading onto First Avenue in Manhattan, all my muscles got tight and started cramping. So weird as this never happened on my long training runs. All I can figure is that I was dehydrated and did not have enough salt. I also don’t think I ate enough throughout the week leading up.

It’s been such a struggle with the eating throughout training. On one hand, who wouldn’t want to eat more! On the other hand, after losing over 100 lbs, there is part of me that doesn’t want to lose control and gain it back. This is something I’m working through and I know it contributed.

Miles 16-19 I ran two blocks then walked one. I was starting to really hurt. Around 19 someone came up beside me and began to talk (he was having stomach issues). This was a blessing as it gave me an excuse to walk further. As I got into the Bronx I kept walking as everytime I tried to run my muscles would not cooperate. I really didn’t know how I would finish. Lots goes through you mind in these kinds of moments!

Leaving the Bronx God really sent me some help. A fellow Team World Vision Runner from Australia, Kevin,  came up beside me and we started talking. His knee had given out earlier and he was trying to make it through like me. He and I walked and talked through Harlem for another few miles. It seemed more like a parade for a little while :). So many encouraging people in the crowd.

As we got into the Park around mile 24 we decided to try and run and then walk when we had to. We were quite a sight I’m sure as our form was full of pain. As we neared mile 25 we just decided to go for it all the way. Kevin and I kept going through all those pains and I was sure they were moving the finish further away as we ran (another favorite sign: “There is a Finish Line”). The last .2 was TOUGH. I kept repeating the Scripture verse on my GoSport ID: “For the joy set before HIM endured the cross” (Hebrews 12:2). God so clearly reminded me how powerful and important finishing is. No matter the trial, no matter how many setbacks, no matter the circumstances, FINISH.

My final time was 6:05. If you’ve read here I was originally hoping for a much better time. But I’m not ashamed. I finished. As a matter of fact, as I was praying later in the night I felt God say that if it would have been easier, if everything would have gone according to plan, I wouldn’t have learned that lesson. I wouldn’t have understood the depth and power of FINISH.

I’m so honored to have been a part of this race and this process. I can’t wait to do another marathon so I can do better — I learned so much about me. I’m so blessed to have been a part of Team World Vision and the joy of seeing 26 children’s lives forever tangibly changed.

Thank you all for your support and encouragement every step along the way. I hope I have the chance to cheer you on…SOON!

 

 

Follow Me Sunday on Your Phone

The NYC Marathon has a cool new app this year for your mobile that allows you to track runners (including me!) during the race. There are iPhone/iPad versions as well as an Android version (but why??).

You need to know my bib #…

Follow me and you’ll know how I’m doing!!

So excited… 🙂